Sex, drugs, and rock ‘n roll! A Buzzed Boomer’s dream!
This is perhaps the final chapter from Volume I of our trail-blazing Airstream trekkers. Sex (Airstream orgasm), drugs (beer) and rock ‘n roll (cover band Get The Led Out at Red Rock). This is no Communications Breakdown. You’ll see.
Big thanks to Hunter S. for coming to the Jet Cannon writer’s-block rescue once again!
Seattle writer Tantri Wija regularly amazes us with unique alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages featured in The Seattle Times. Recently, she wrote about Himalayan butter tea which powers sherpas up Mt. Everest and the like. Wow! We want some. She describes it as a power smoothie. Okay! Except…. We don’t have any yak butter on hand or pu-erh tea. We could probably find grass-fed cow butter as a substitute but that would require a trip to the store.
Yet being anxious to prep for today’s Sherpa-level rowing workout, we dropped some regular butter in some regular black tea. Let’s just say we never tasted anything quite like it (and possibly won’t ever again). But what about the workout? Coated-tongue in mouth, we climbed on the rower and quickly exceeded all our previous workouts. Not really. Our workout plan usually includes a pre-workout concoction that includes caffeine. But telling people that our workout regimen includes cow butter tea, well, that’s worth something! And we’ll be sure to order Himalayan butter tea, the real thing, if we ever get to the Himalyans.
Next, butter coffee. Yeah. That’s a thing, too. We’ve apparently not been paying attention.
Climb every mountain…..
Today we’re dispensing with any Buzz other than that gained from a good workout. No alcohol, weed, caffeine, or other substances.
Now, there is only one thing you need to know about your fitness capabilities and needs. And that’s what you and Dr. Spock need to figure out. Everyone is different.
There are many fitness options for seniors including walking, water aerobics, resistance band training, dumbbell strength training, pilates, yoga, rowing, and cycling, to name a few. To release some endorphins you’ll need to get the heart rate up to a safe-but-elevated level appropriate for your age and physical condition.
What really matters is to do something physical. Regularly. Beer bicep curls do not count.
– Jet Cannon
Want to enjoy the great outdoors via a recreational vehicle? Here are some tips from our roving glampers on where to park your rig. Airstream Dreams Livin’ In Tin Edition.
Jet Cannon for Hunter S.
Paralympians compete in their 50’s and sometimes, in past Games, into their 70’s. Among the 240-member Team USA per AARP, the incredibly impressive over-50 Paralympians include archers Lia Coryell (56) and Andre Shelby (52); cyclists Alicia Dana (52), Freddie De Los Santos (51), Aaron Keith (50), Monica Sereda (54), Jill Walsh (58) and Joe Berenyi (52); rower Russell Gernaat (55); table tennis player Michael Godfrey (57); shot put thrower Scot Severn (53); and wheelchair fencer Terry Hayes (63).
Go USA!
Here’s the good news about exercising. Vigorous exercise can release euphoric endorphins. “Runner’s high”. All natural! So that’s great news if you’re physically able to safely get the heart rate going. (Consult your doctor blah blah blah and before getting out of bed in the morning.)
But that’s not all the good news about exercising! Staying in shape as we age allows up to enjoy responsible amounts of alcohol, caffeine, and weed… which you may not even want so much if you’re able to work in two or three hours of exercise a week.
Walking is good. So is swimming, cycling and rowing. Or online aerobic workouts. All good. A little bit, like 15 minutes, a couple times a day adds up and also helps keep the weight down. And summertime opens up more of those exercise options.
Healthline.com offers lots of good information about health and fitness including tips for us older, but better, Baby Boomers. See you at the next Olympic Trials!
– Jet Cannon
There are approximately 70 million Baby Boomers living in the United States right now. 70 million!! And some interesting things are emerging.
Now, none of the above is backed up by any facts or data. But does it matter? It feels good! It feels right! It must be true!
– Jet Cannon
As music festivals go, Watershed is right up there among the great ones mixing partying, country music, and spectacular scenery. The Gorge Amphitheatre sits high above the mighty Columbia River in George, Washington. Add theme-based, colorful camping and country music stars like Tim McGraw and you have the ingredients for three days of serious fun. This year the event runs from July 30- August 1 and a few tickets may still be available, probably due to pandemic concerns. Normally Watershed is sold out.
If country music isn’t your cup of tea, check out georgeamphitheatre.com for tickets to acts like Phish, Dave Matthews, Tame Impala, and KISS.
– Jet Cannon
Jagger Eaton’s bronze medal in the street skateboarding event at the Tokyo Olympics inspired us to take up skateboarding again; learn new tricks, slide down steep rails, and do spin moves over concrete stairs. What a great way to stay in shape! Gym is closed. Weather is good. Enjoy the outdoors. Perfect for Baby Boomers. All except for the skateboard part.
More appropriate for Boomers is walking or biking. If there’s a park nearby, throw in some bench push-ups and rail pull-ups (beware of skateboarders sliding down the rail). Stairs? Take a few careful trips up and down. Access to a pool? Swimming engages the whole body and is low-impact. Access to a body of water? Kayaking or canoeing works the upper body.
Fitness for Baby Boomers is perhaps more important than it is for the younger set. That said, we need to select sports that make sense. Save the BMX biking and skateboarding for those whose bones mend quickly.
Olympic couch-surfing is great for inspiration but remember to get out there and stay fit!
– Jet Cannon
Photo courtesy of Arizonasports.com
We queued up in big line to sample the sugar at Voodoo Doughnut in Portland, Oregon. Lots of choices and all of them were tasty. We noticed lots of tourists checking out the enormous Powell Books carrying their pink box of doughnuts. Meanwhile, we’re still sugar Buzzed.
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Check them out at v-moda.com
– Jet Cannon
Noted Buzzed Boomer contributor, Old Man Wrong, will drop into Seattle today from the Bay Area to share his expertise in catching a Buzz in multiple ways. Faithful readers may remember OMW’s posts on the art of cooking steak, popcorn, and….. Brussel Sprouts. He also knows a bit about fitness.
An open water swimmer, OMW will first brave the brisk waters of Puget Sound to fire up those exercise endorphins. Brrrr! I’ll be doing some beer can curls from the safety of the beach.
Next, we will visit B & E Meats, established in 1958 by Bob and Earl Green, where OMW will select the proper steak for pan searing and grilling later in the evening. Yum.
Finally, a stop is planned at the Tin Room Bar for a classic, poured-at-the-table, dry gin Martini. “Quite simply, no other drink even comes up to its knees.” Further quoting Jay Jacobs in A Great And Sudden Glory, we shall “stoop to pay obeisance to this wonder. The pursed lips draw off a modicum of the only liquid to which the adjective “brittle” can be applied. The taste buds undergo extreme arousal, and a great and sudden glory is experienced in the general vicinity of the pharynx. With startling clarity the drink seems to irradiate its own descent through darkness from gullet to gut.” Queue Frank Sinatra.
We will look forward to some of OMW’s takeaways from this quick trip to the Pacific Northwest in a future post. Meanwhile, cheers!
– Jet Cannon
You know popcorn? You may not know popcorn. It shouldn’t cost $58.50 and leave you sick after watching The Matix XII at the Come On In, What Are The Odds Of Getting Ill-plex. It‘s not the ‘as much fun’ (actually far more fun) ‘to make than it is to eat’ stuff. Although the J. Pop experience was always oddly…hot, I won’t lie. And it ain’t Orville Fudruckers Buttery Microwave in a 2 minute ‘bing!!’ all done folded bag. The waxy weirdness of the insides, burnt clumps here and there, dry tasteless stuff elsewhere.
Grow up! People been trying to mess up popcorn since Charles Cretors invented the popcorn maker out of his old Chicago candy store in like 1890. Get in touch with this Nature’s wonder y’all!l Ima tell you how.
Good p’corn needs the stove. Period. Why did our moms get a gadget or machine for everything? Keeping away from dirty nature, I guess. Oh well – Greatest Generation, they did win WWII etc. We can forgive ‘em for wanting to get out the kitchen and live! But. Corn goes on the stove.
Pot. Oil (Google tell you which kind) and you can throw in some bacon fat/lardo or butter because umami. Fair measure of salt. I get it – salt bad. But salt ‘properly seasons’ food. Food’s swizzle stick. To counteract the bad, go for a nice long walk every day. Ahem.
Gring in some pepper. (Or buy a pepper grinder and some peppercorns and then grind in. C’mon!! Thro’ out that powered pepper from 2011. How old are you??!?) Now, there is a secret ingredient. It is lemon juice. Not ReaLemon, that of the plastic lemon-looking thing with the green screw top. Actual lemon juice, a good bit, squeeze into the oil/lardo/salt/pepper mix. Set it all on the stove on lowwwwwww. Low. Then put in the corn.
Now go watch a Next Gen or something on Netflix…45 min. By that time — Data having let go of the dream of becoming fully human, somehow becoming more human in the process — the kernels (not colonels) are dark brown and nutty and ready, come what may. Ready to get rocked. Now you gotta put down your phone thingy and get up.
What is needed is a blast of the highest heat known to your stove, you at the controls. There’s a lid on the pot and there’s a towel over the lid and you’re shaking that pot like it’s never got shook, its shoes are falling off, it’s missing appointments, it’s making promises it’ll never keep, it is giving and giving, corn popping like absolute crazy, shake shake shake shake and then…
It’s over. Last chord in Day In The Life… bonggggnngggg….
That’s it! You will like the result.
Old Man Wrong
Exercise the fun way! Saddle up! But safety first! Let’s see I need my helmet (with blue flasher on the back and rear view mirror), florescent green vest with pocket for phone, padded bike pants for that firm saddle, bike gloves to keep the hands from going numb, Apple Watch to capture biking exercise minutes and miles, mask in case I need to talk with someone, glasses for eye protection, water bottle and Camelback for max hydration, bike shoes, sunblock, seat bag with mini first aid kit, and baseball cap for post-ride helmet-hair. And….. we’re out of time. Tomorrow we’ll get an earlier start.
– Jet Cannon
